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“I don’t understand your hesitation. You say that you love me but you don’t want to go a step further in our relationship.
What’s wrong? If you really loved me, you would climb that step.”
Popular culture makes us believe that Love conquers all. We have all been exposed, as children, to a story or two, where there is a Princess and her Prince Charming who are confident that with only the strength of their love they will live happily ever after.
That belief takes roots in our heads and develops undesirable weeds. Naively, it’s tinting our decisions when choosing a partner.
- When he starts picking you over his friends. He will spend a quiet Friday night with you instead of playing poker or going for a drink only with his friends.
- When he seems to be overjoyed when he meets her and when he spends time with her. The man is in love.
- When he gradually welcomes her feminine stuff in his house; her special soap in the bathroom, her earrings in the bedroom and her tampons under the sink. Read the rest of this entry »
The other day, I was with my sweet love when my sister called. She was in a bad mood because she was babysitting my cat (I was out of town) and my cat had made a mess in her sofa. I was feeling guilty about that, so I went in the bedroom to think it over in silence.
After a while, my sweet love joined me and the first thing he said was :
‘’I can see this situation is bothering you, isn’t it?’’
In that moment, I thought he was the greatest boyfriend ever. I felt understood and comforted. I was in a better disposition to be the best partner that I could be for him.
Then I realized that he was talking the same language of love as mine. I am a Visual and I understand better when we communicate with me in visual ways. He used the word ‘’see’’.
I am certain that the Auditory and Feeling people out there don’t fully understand the impact on me, however, Visuals out there, I am sure, understand how I must have felt.
Having the same communication style or using the same communication style that your partner is sensitive to, greatly avoids missed connections, unnecessary challenges and increase intimacy by reducing the events of resentment.